See Me

See me.

Simple words, but full of breath and life and reason to be. I am not invisible. Here I am! You see me. 

There's an episode of Star Trek where Seven, the former Borg drone, is working with the dangerous Omega molecule. But it could explode at any moment, tear apart sub-space, and render warp travel impossible throughout the quadrant! For Trekkies that means all kinds of bad things. But...Omega is perfection to the Borg. It appeals to them as some sort of possibility, just out of reach, that there can be something, no matter how small and brief, that is without flaw. We learn that they tried to stabilize it at some point and destroyed 29 cubes (their ships) in the process. However, they managed to force stability and glimpse it for a fraction of a second. Seven hopes to try again. 

What drove the Borg to pursue this, knowing how dangerous it was? What was the payoff? Captain Janeway says some of the Starfleet scientists theorized that Omega was present at the big bang (gasp!) but she does not see it the way Seven does. Seven needs something from Omega. She tries to convince the Captain to let her try, to no avail. It is simply too risky. So she hopes to make it happen anyway. 

The whole crew is working to destroy the elements that will make up Omega. Seven is desperately working to both see it and then blow it to smithereens before it can explode and kill everyone. Just a second, that's all I need, it seems she's hoping. Just a glimpse. Please. 

She is unable to stabilize the molecule but, just when we think all is lost, it becomes stable on its own. It just forms and holds its shape longer than any scientific effort had been able to manage previously. And it looks at Seven. She stares into it and has the distinct impression that it is looking back at her. She is seen!

Star Trek sometimes talks about God. Or tries to. Kirk, Spock, and McCoy encounter the sun worshipers in the original series and, despite being accomplished scientists and anthropologists, totally miss that they are son worshipers until Uhura points it out. It was kind of clumsy with everyone wishing they could watch Christianity unfold again on a new planet. But still. 

Deep Space Nine leaned spiritually with the emissary and the Bajoran prophets/wormhole aliens. But Bajor's prophets had a hard time communicating with the people they hoped to lead. Or crush. I am not sure what they were doing since the Bajorans seemed to be on their own a lot. Although, they did vanquish the Dominion's forces in the wormhole when Sisko bullied them with, "You want to be gods? Then be gods!" And they did free Sisko from his depression by pointing out that he chose to exist in his worst memory. 

And Voyager. As far as I can remember, this is the most spiritual of the episodes. It even ends with Seven and Janeway in the holodeck, Seven gazing at a crucifix on the wall of the DaVinci hologram's workshop.

Star Trek tells us about ourselves by looking at us with alien eyes. How they see us tells us what is important in humanity, what makes us who we are. There's this part of me that would love to go out there, traveling through the vastness of space, no longer an odd person but a member of a group of aliens, outsiders, Borg! All the while, pointing out the obvious. Look, a molecule...God! Look, people, reaching out...creation, life!

Always, everywhere I look, God is there, being, making, showing. Some people look for science alone to explain this. To me they are the same, God and science. I am drawn to this, this thing that is looking back at me. Like Seven, seen.

The Omega Directive is season 4, episode 21 of Star Trek: Voyager

Neelix Forgives Jetrel

You know when something profound shows up in an unexpected place? It abruptly leaps up and shouts, "I am everywhere you look!"

I've been watching Star Trek lately. People with plastic stuck to their faces. Warp speed. Technology even more impressive than this flat, square thing I am typing on. The stories of Star Trek take us far out into space and introduce us to alien worlds to tell us about ourselves.

My unexpected hero is the spotted, colorful alien Neelix on Star Trek Voyager. He's helpful and kind, usually trying to please everyone. We know a few harrowing details of his past, the war that claimed most of his world and left few survivors, his hope of reunion with his lost family in the afterlife. But there's more to Neelix than that.

For one thing, he's a funny looking guy with troll hair and a fiendish taylor. He's a character on a television show. Does anything good happen on television? Uh...

Neelix meets a man named Jetrel, the scientist who developed the weapon that destroyed Neelix's world. By the time he and Neelix cross paths, the man has come to his senses and lost his mind with guilt. He will do anything to bring back the people he killed. He is consumed with an invention that will reconstruct all that the original weapon destroyed, literally reassembling people out of thin air. However, he is simply unable to make it work. He can not undo the damage he caused. He can not bring anyone back. His grief is palpable. He doesn't have much time left. He is dying, from the same poison that killed his victims. He has also lost his family because of what he did. Now he is losing his life.

Jetrel is not entirely sympathetic. He blames others, saying he only made the weapon, others used it. He says he saved lives by ending the war. But he is a broken, desperate man, unable to redeem himself even with lies. He is rotting in the immense weight of his sins, trapped, held down, and now dying physically as well.

Neelix hates him. He has every right to. The man is guilty. Neelix is still suffering.

But...

Neelix, goofy, underestimated Neelix, does something that startles, shocks, and restores me. Lovable, childlike, internally grieving Neelix solemnly enters sick bay to confront his ailing enemy. Will he finally unleash years of anger and loss on Jetrel? Maybe he will gloat in his enemy's painful death. But what Neelix does instead is subtle and sudden.

He says simply, "I forgive you."

Neelix forgives and, in the process, sets himself free and stuns his now dying adversary (and me). Jetrel passes away with an expression of astonishment and gratitude on his face.

Why did he do it? There is something innocent in the character of Neelix. He wants to fix, repair, and heal. We find out in this episode that Neelix has a strong sense of his own failings as well. He has a dignified humility, but it comes from knowing his own guilt. He longs to set people free, to heal. When Neelix forgave Jetrel he became better somehow. He was restored.

Jetrel is episode 15, season 1 of Star Trek Voyager